十年之载归来是坏事

看我十年之载归来这熟悉的私人空间是好事？

不好！这证明了我有心事。

为什么每次每次都说我像你家人。

不是不觉得，不是不晓得， 而是完全一丝丝也不像。

人嘛？

否定不代表不理；沉默不代表逃避。

为什么你就这么认定我是那不理不睬，就像他们逃避一样?

“你不要像我妈那样。。你不要像我安娣那样。。”

这话听来，他们是我们的好长辈啊。像他们何乐而不为？

对我而言，我是那么的排撤。因为你埋没了我的优点，把我当成他们的同类 :'(

可是那为何不说，“你不要像你妈那样？”

我却觉得我很像我爸妈。。。我爱他们！很爱很爱！

我们五口才是真正的同类。

为什么？ WHY？

Please don't ever always compare me with them.. I'm not one of them..

WHY? I'M NOT EVEN ONE OF THEM!!!!!!

WHERE MY SUCCRAM GOES? SUCCRAM, I MISS YOU!!!!!!!!! :'( :'(

First of September

September Eleven is the date of the terrorist attacked tragedy.

But First of September is a brand new day for me =))

Can't wait these days back to me after so many months of waiting.

FINALLY!! :D :D

I regretted the decision i'd made 2 years ago :( Really do! Lead me to physically change a lot, healthiness do affected as well..... Or i should say i'm not regretted but just the period is way too long. I learned a lot throughout this 2 years and 4 months. The most importantly, i'd met the best ever Boss in my life. Okay, he's really do, indeed capable! :D Glad he's still my boss after that... Oh yeah!

It had already past. I hope the coming days will bring me to the brighter doorway.
It's time to make a change! CHANGING!!!!!

YOU CAN DO IT, JUST AIM AND GO FOR IT!!! CTL, i'm coming!! =) Another learning arena...

Promise

We had reach a conclusion and made a promise with each other just now.

I'm not sure whether i'd made the right decision. Am wondering should I happy or sad about the so called good news he brought to me. I thought i should be sad? But the moments he told me, frankly I smile :)

Will the moment i sing to him "No Promises" comes? I'm not even Shayne Ward XD I guess he will chop my head into pieces then. Hahahahahaha! I'd tried my best keep trying, trying, trying... If no feedback, I thinked i'm really need to accept the fact.

Let's the timing decide where shall i pursue to? Let it be......God, please don't fool on me. Shed me some light please?

I feel myself like had no value added recently. I shall start doing something to myself the soonest i can. Let's back to study then!!

Thinking.....

There's a chance of going overseas came across...

Should i just go and have a try? :'(

Should i just say, "never try never knows?"

Too much of thinking, too much of brainstorming...

I just not dare to take 1 step further.....

I'd thinked for 2 days.

After all those incidents happened.....

Actually i've thinking of if year 2012 really NOT the end the world only i will leave here..... But now why that fast?

If 2012 really happened, I will feel very guilty coz i didn't even appreaciate the 2 years time left to stay together with them....

I just ask her opinion about it just now, she said,"Go try! Earn more.. I didn't block you gals from doing anything you want to do."

I know actually her heart was so upset, her tone of voice suddenly change..

Or i just thinked too much, she just awake from sleep thats why she sounds so...

Anyway, i just wish somebody please support me. Doesn't she already support me? What I want now :'(

I really don't know where to stay....

Sometimes i just too considerate about him. He just recover from illness and he has to accept that one by one giving him the real surprise........ Should i choose A or B.

I WANT BOTH ACTUALLY!!!!! :'( GOD, CAN I ?

巧克力

我已经好久好久告别了我这个熟悉的地方，好怀念那段常常写部落的日子。想把我旅游周记记载在部落，可是懒惰在作怪，好像都几个月了。

我的朋友，好久不见，你们还好吗？
My dear friends, long time no see... How are you?

我在这还好好的。
只是最近感觉多了好多家庭的负担，时间还有金钱。
花好多，好多。。

以前的我会把钱与时间都花在事业，享受美食和到处交流。
现在的我会把钱与时间花在家人身上。

属于说，“经一事，长一智”

很庆幸我的老爸很乖，很听话。
现在的他，早睡早起；
饮食健康，天天定时运动，不再抽烟了。
看到现在的他，还蛮开心的 :)
换了个专科，他还挺喜欢的。
那医生年轻有为，幽默，很细心，抖得他很开心，
他都变得很很很听话。
只是老人家常常唠唠叨叨，念经那样啦。哈哈哈！

还有，我最近前一个月和老妈做生意了，
搞我公司同事的便当生意。
妈妈负责煮，我负责载送与宣传，顺便偷偷师。
毕竟妈的Nyonya厨艺一级棒，想把她的厨艺给学起来。
当然同时，也可以促进母女关系，
何乐已不为呢？

>
My brochure :) Huang Ma Ma Dinner Box
Oh yea, that's my food blog address... *under construction*

你不懂那种心情..
真的很有成就感，超有成就感的。
哈哈哈，妈有两天去了KL，
我得代替它作饭卖，超压力的啦！

你懂啦，我这小瓜以前是随随便便炒面炒饭吃，真正下厨经验才几个星期；
我妈呢？四十多年五十年有叻，怎么比啊？
吼吼吼，还好还算可以啦。。

哈哈哈！两天RM20盈利还算不错！XD
虽然不是很多，可是却有血有汗的哦！
呵呵呵呵呵。。。

最近有了个习惯，每天必吃巧克力！
救命！它好像白粉一样，不可一失~
而且最近也胃口大好，不停的吃吃吃，
希望明天的那块是最后一块了 :(
不想有那种上瘾的感觉。

我只是不想自己在放完工回来，
一直拚命的去想，想，想，想个没完没了，
好像只有巧克力可以让我开心，不去想别的。。

救我吧，我好像真的中巧克力毒了！

。。。需要关怀的我。。。

Up and Down

Finally have time to blog before procceed to work. Just back from hospital again.

Hmm, Just back from SG yesterday. 12 hours walk continuously everyday @ there. FUN but Tiring.. Those people there were very fast paced. If you really compared the speed those people walking in LRT/MRT station in KL & SG. It's a very big different. Glad that i didn't cancelled my trip! So happy can meet again my 3Sifu all together, Kel my 3 years no see roomie, small bear another 5 years time and finally batu mama for few months time. Don't even have time yet to review again my photos and video taken in SG.

Oh ya, havent updated you guys about Ah Pa's situation. He was admitted to hospital last friday. All brain scan and medical report released the day after that, his tiny nerve of this head was stuck. That's the reason why non-stop of headache and facing problem when walking. Luckily it can be cure just have some medicine from time to time, no need to undergoing operation :D However, not allow to smoke, drive his "mercedes motor" and even car anymore. Between, it's still a good news!

His high blood pressure was so inconsistent. But today he looks much even better! GREAT he has good appetite today!

Alright just a very short entry, not enough time then. Will blog about my trip when i'm only free then.

The worries come across again?

Actually i plan to write an entry today about how happy am i lately and those stuff which i can't wait for? But now.........

Sis back from KL later.

The worries attacked me again today after accompany him to see doctor.
"Strok" is the phrase i scared a lot a lot now!!! Can pls stop using this word in front of me?

I didn't that emotional as last time for this time. Calm in listening and speaking although still can't control my tears. Thinking of what should we do now for the time being?

I'm still struggling..... Should i still going SG this Sat? Should I?
Wondering She able to sacrify with me if i don't want to go anymore, or just let her be，let her go alone lol.....

Or should i just listen to Sing, pukul dia pengsan then hantar dia pi hospital tomorrow? :'(

Hope he feel better with no headache again tomorrow!!!! RECOVER SOON!!!!!

你可以把我的寿命与他的平均，我们一起生存。
我一点都不在乎！

你可以把我的钱财拿了，况且都多不了多少。
我一点都不在乎！

只容许你给我多几年，几十年的时间来敬孝，可以吗？

为什么好人，二十四孝的，这么衷心与神的，这么多病痛？
而为什么那些臭鸡蛋，王八蛋什么事都没有？

有时真的很不明白为什么世界有时就是这样的残酷，那么不公平。

为什么？为什么？为什么啦！！

就因为你每天都为我们拜神保佑，我才会在车祸中逃过一劫。

老爸，相信我，有神灵保佑你，你一定会没事的！！！

Trust Man?!!

Trust Man? Will you... Recently I've been hearing lots of point of view on this topic? I'd spend the whole night yesterday to really read through what's all about Jack Neo scandal affair news and watched the press conference video too. As again TODAY, i'd listened to Chen Fung 988 on air, coudn't believe all callers call in are all about their husband scandal affair. OMGGG! What happened to this world nowsaday??? Too much of sexual attraction lately huh...

How important is a MARRIAGE & FAMILY for them? :( So dissapointed! Where's the responsibilt? Love is not a game!!!! WTH! While listening to 988 at work, we did have a discussion on this topic. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhh, dissapointly you know what ONE of those guys said? "Why man not allow to have secret affair? You know sometimes guys really can't control of those sexual attraction?" I DON'T KNOW! If he's my bf, i will CHOP him into pieces then throw him into the sea, glad that i'm not. *joking ok!* HAHAHAHAHA! Wish he doesn't read this :P



How about the video? I really impressed of the forgiveness of Mrs Neo. How many woman will do so after his own husband had secret affair with around 11 women for the past few years. There were 11 times, will you believe him won't step into another relationship again after he appologized. CRAP! Why should she stand out and said "I forgive you!" :'( It's belongs to personal family problem, should it settle at home instead? Why should she? She'd forced to face the media to protect his director reputation? I felt very pity on her... God has the eyes and will bless those who really need blessing right? God bless Irene K'ng!!

Frankly, he is a very good director! and I like his movie!! Even he did scandal or not totally not influence whether i will watch his movie again or not! Anyway, wish his appology was not just verbally said.

You know how hurt when you hurt someone mentally?
Hey Guys out there, PLS RESPECT WOMAN ok!~

I'm very respect of those guys who really respect us LADY! :D Oh ya i'm yet a woman :P Sweet talk or manja can be just nothing at times. If you care of someone, just take some action will do =)

GUYS, DO TREASURE YOUR LOVES ONE, TAKE GOOD CARE OF HER, DON'T EVER TRY TO HURT HER!

P/s: Pls pour water on my head, i'm super hot now!

A funny incident with Sii Sii Snake

:D Oh ya this happened last few days at my house.

Really tired of working up until very late these days. I guess i'm not sleeping every night but like become unconcious. Alarm clock coudn't wake me up, fan closed coudn't wake me up, I guess FIRE FIRE also coudn't wake me up now! :P Sleep until no year no month.... HAHA!

Waked myself up after 2 hours of slept for periodontic in clinic. Having a tuff and painful time from doctor again. LaLaLa! 爱美不要命？ HAHAAHAHA!:D LOL.... This is for cleanliness and health too right isn't it? Going back doing SC things for hours..... then went for a nap again!

Dad shouted very loudly, ping ping pang pang, "Leng, wake up wake up got snake!!!!" I jumped up from bed and ran to see where's that "cute" snake? :P Dad pointed to the hole nearby ceiling, "Tuuuuu There!!!" I just saw its brown colour head! Went to kitchen saw its tails... I guess it got 1meter long! Dad said wanna go and use hammer chop its head down. Yerrr so cruel! Don't know which kind of snake is it...If its action is faster than the hammer HOW?

So i try to call fire engage for rescue. Wanna called 994 directly but get colded :P "Haiyo, 1M snake u wanna call 994 so big deal ah?" Later i go google and look for the nearest branch fire engage. Surprise!!!!! Google don't have it, just have another branch contact. So i just called the other branch and get the contact. Tada!!!!! FIRE ENGAGE PHONE ENGAGED!!! Imagined if it's not a 1meter snake but a Cobra you say what will happen? Later finally it get through...

Fireman: Hello, Selamat Petang! (with a low tone)
Me : Selamat Petang Encik! Rumah i sekarang ni ada ular! Tapi ia agak-agak satu meter saja. bolehkah i report?
Fireman: YAAA Boleh!
Me: Encik hantar dua atau tiga orang mai tengok cukup. Ia sangat kecik saja!
Fireman: YA OK!

After noted down my address, i hang up. While waiting, waiting and waiting... Neighbours came and helped up hope to kill the snake before the fire engage reached. I don't know what's the purpose of? They said this tiny things no need to report fire engage la, later they charged at least RM50 for the cathing process. Hmmmmm, All this while, I thought that it's under government and free services to the residents. I've never heard before BOMBA charged a single cents of provide services? In the end, the snake was escaping to the rooftop d..

After 10 minutes, fire engaged reached. That's the climax!

Can hear the fire engine siren few meters away. OMG!! It's towards our house. Sweat!! Lots of neighbours at my area walked over to check it out what had happened? -_-

This is the type of fire engine reached our house :P Extinguish the fire?? Where's on fire?













I thought they will just come in a van instead. Listen guys, "Fireman drove a fully equipped fire engine to catch a 1 meter long snake!!" Does this sounds over?

MUAHAAHAHAHHAHA! I coudn't stop laughing when i refreshed of this really.. It's so ridiculous lah!!!!!!

You know what dad doing? After that, he have to tell the story to all the neighbours surrounded, "Haiyoooo, my daughter lah! Just a small snake she called bomba!!" :P :P :P Alamak, kan saya dah tanya pakcik tu, pakcik tu kata saya boleh report mahupun ia ialah 1meter ular saja. Eh leh! Kalau ular tu anak cobra macam mana leh? Kan saya betul? Bijak lagi neh? Kan? Kan? Kan? HAHAHAHA~

The Accident

1 day before CNY, Should I be pleased that i'm still alive? THANKS GOD I'm safe!

It was a real nightmare! I still remembered when the time it bang and i was all alone at around 5am!!! :'( Still in the dark. I was driving home along the one way straight road and suddenly a Kelisa came fast from a junction and hit my little white. I do an immergency break but it's too late. My car was lost control after front rim tyre and driver seat being hit.

I should not walked out from my car immediately isn't it at that time? But i did! However the opposition still in car for a few seconds. I don't know what they do in car, guess what? Might be wearing their clothes I guess? WTH PEOPLE! Want to do anything fun please do it at home! Finally, a half naked guy driver with a lady came out from their vehicle. Both of them looked tired and really steam with slamp clothing, I guess he was drunk or taking any pils. He keep murmured, "I can't see who's the person who knock my car? Who? Who?" HELLO, my car just in front of him!! I start yelling "I'm the car owner lah!!! PLS say clearly You knock my car or i knock yours?" He started to keep quiet and that lady spoken in Mandarin slang China! She keep asking around who is reporter and she lost her iphone at the scene. I felt so pressure of the surrounding whereby those agents keep making noise recommending me let them do my car insurance claim service. Fortunately there are two husband and wife who owned a bar at that area came over the scene immediately and help to calm me down too.

Seriously I was so scared of being alone and don't know what to do! Want to call family but scared they're still sleeping :( Started to call my closest Seng Kau Fu Zai but coudn't get him. As u know, i really wish the one who closest with me to be with me at that time rather than unfamiliar person mah. Huhuhu, keep calling, pass here and there. Finally they met me at police station. THANKS A LOT to all who being a good accompanion of mine during my tuff time :( Especially Jack, thank you very much!! I was kind of worried don't know they will go report or not as the car belongs to rental accompany. Pray for it they will!! If not, my car's NDC will become zero and i have to claim my own insurance d.

My left neck and shoulder even more pain now compared to early morning. Hopefully will become better after taking the medicines given by Doctor. NO SWOLLEN PLS!! *Namo Amitabha* I still want to sui sui during CNY!!!! :( Huhuhu so bad! Saw my little white being move by the track, he need to admit to hospital for about 3 weeks time. I feel like I was like temporary lost some memory, Do I? My brain was like confuse and mix up with everything, is it sequela?

I feel I was like temporary lost some memory, Do I?Huhuhuhu tell me why ME? Why just 1 day before CNY? You know i like CNY a lot!! Can't believe that i can solve all these without crying. Steadynya! Once i stepped into the footstep of my house, i really can't control my tears anymore.

PA, MA, I'M FINALLY HOME!!!!!!! :'(

P/s: Year of Cow shiuuuuu shiuuu quick quick go!!

Make Up Workshop

Attending for fun.. Hoping to learn something :D But then end up eat more than learn. Might be not enough of sleep too... HAHAHAHAHA! Its soya cooked curry chicken instead of using santan bestnya! :P


Teoh Khar Chin's punya product! Putihnya! :P
文丑丑！Lighting problem..




The closer look =)

Moving Forward with a new mission?

2010 isn't a good kick start for me. Let's say today enough, I BANG my face to my keyboard stand this morning. *ahhh, steel ah my head* :P DAMN Painful!!! I guess tomorrow my face will Oohh Che O.o like Chong Mou Yin. HAHA! Just now cook supper wantan mee, the moment i hold the ear of pan, OUCHHH burn my forefinger. *ouchh now my finger like turtle shell grow on it* Ok la, damn bad luck today d.... Still looking forward for a GOOD GOOD Day after today =) I wanna be like AVATAR can?

Yo, i've set none of mission for this year. Don't dare to set but i guess i have nothing to pursue to now.

Just wish that ALL OF US stay happy and healthy at all time. That's simple! Hope just the ONLY wish, God will fullfill my lil wish.

Ang Kong, wa bo tam sim, you will fullfill mine right?



Prosperity "burger"? :P Lol... Seen her like see Mc D! HAHA!



Still CRAVE for FOOD FOOD FOOD!!! :D







My fav so called "don't know what name" @ Matt To Lou KL.. While ordered, just say Yea I want that one something with yolk. That's it! HAHA! Went for twice still can't remember the actual name..

Alright, new mission for the year CRAVE FOR More food!!! HEEEE! Lol...

A Brand New Year 2010

Step Step Goes High 步步高升！











This is my 1st post for the brand new year! :D HAPPY NEW YEAR!! Roar Year..

May everything goes well this year! =) It doesn't matter it's not a GREAT year but i just wished everything i wanna do goes smoothly. I do have 4 wishes last year and i were so aggressively worked hard towards them. Just one of them succeed. Hmm... From the 1st day i stepped into, I have a BIG DREAM! However, my spirit doesn't stay anymore..... Don't know where it goes. Everyday just passed in calm, i seems like a robot. Wished i can make a change soon! Bring back my confidence!



Love is all around. Cherish all the time! <3


50th anniversary, will it be another 50's? Nice to see but dot dot dot :P FREE better than none right? :)

FOUR DAYS no internet access really killed me! I've nothing to do at home! The outcome I've successfully recorded my 1st performance - 情非得已 =) VERY HAPPY! Just realised it has RECORDING function :P Has been NG N times, finally played successfully. Fuiyohh... It wasn't perfect 100%, at least good try! BRAVO! Wished one day i can play ONE time kao tim. When's the day will come? =) DREAM DREAM DREAM.... Going to buy USB cable connect to computer, wanna listen my LIVE mp3 in my blog soon? Yayayayaya *PROUD* =) =) =) I wanna make me proud of myself!!

I look superb cute Now!~ 2010

The first phrase when everyone come to me was, "CUTE LO!" "KAWAII NEH"
I LOOKED SUPERB CUTE NOW, HOW??????




Sometimes i do looked into the mirror and I also really beh dong myself!!! :P This hairstyle look over cute on me. Hence, do i need to act cute and pose 1, 2, 5 when greeting someone? Wakakakakaakaka, only match with my look what? OH MY GOD!

12122009 :

Looked for Boon for the 1st time to be my hairstylist.. My best friend's bf! Knowing him for soooooooo many years d, haven't bong chan his saloon :P Nahhh, this call friend..HAHAAH! Finally!!!!! I went!!! Never knows he was that geng! Yea he didn't dissapointed me :)I'm glad!! I like it very much!!!! Just one weakness, over cute d :P Coz i don't to be "that" cute but lady like..

Funny dialogue happened:-

Boon: 烫直还是卷？ Decide d, Straight or Curly?
Leng: 给你自由发挥啦，烫直！Freestyle la, as you like. As long as straight will do..
Boon: 啊，烫直了哪还能给我自由发挥么？自由发挥，就卷啦！适合你的脸！ Ah, what else can i do after straightening? Nothing much d :P Freestyle I curl lah, suit you...
Leng: 呵呵，OK啦，你喜欢啦！不要把我的脸弄大就好。。 OK lah, whatever... as you like :P Just don't want my face look that big enough..

The outcome after sit there from 2pm to 9.30pm: LIKE THAT loo. He said i follow cute trend one. So in the end become that cute lo! Coming friday wanna go dye hair d, don't want that bright colour d. How's red purple, nice? =)

Very not use to my look now. I look like another person now, i wanna slim down myself! Hopefully can slim down my dudu face at the same time. Yeaaaa, i've made it for 3 days d, GAMBATTE! =)

Everybody, i'm still alive! :)

This post is to clarify that i'm still alive. HAHA!

Guess, I'm over neglecting my blog here.. I try to bring back my mood in blogging. Anyway, it's precious every night when i stepped into my own place, listening to the song aired ~ Mandy Moore's Only Hope.. It's kinda relaxing!

=) Get me back here, my lovin soulful place. Miss everybody!!

回家

今日回得好早，他们都看电影去了，
我雀跃万分赶回家，阿姐回家啦啦啦啦！
还不是每一次回家都期待着整家人坐在客厅聊天的时光:)

你都不懂好久好久没有这样？
你都不懂那种快活儿的感觉？
要换去早班还不是为了这点？

自从去年就很少有这么的机会，
何来改一改这么的生活习惯，
好想回到两年前准时放工的那段日子。

似乎没有两全其美的，
你要么事业，要么家庭？
我可是两者都要！！

你是否可以给我一个机会？

最近好不情绪化，
不再说废话，不再嘻嘻哈哈，
他们了解我心情也不敢惹我。

那受委屈的感觉又再现，
最讨厌那宁静的夜里，
听歌的时候也会流泪。

身体好累，心灵也好累，
某时某刻都找些时间来透透气，
感觉沉默会淡化一切，可却不是。

盼“嘻嘻哈哈”的你会很快就回来！
需要你的支持~加油吧！

My Love Tissot

With My Love! =)
My early birthday present for myself! Thank you ME! :p
HAPPY BIRTHDAY!



















Name: my dear SotSot :p
DOB: 31.10.2009

I'm so lucky! It's NEW ARRIVAL, just reach in the morning. Fresh from the "oven".

Posing! Posing! HAHA! I know that i'm a lil sampat! :p But anyway pls forgive me as this is the 1st time i bought an sooooo expensive watch for myself! Oh yaa should say i never bought a watch for myself, my old baby Casio was a present scoring 3A's in STPM. Sooo you see it has been years ago. Now i get a new one!!! :D YEAHHH! and with empty pocket now.. HAHAHAHA!

Alright just a gift for the year 2009. Last year get a camera, what's next? HEHE.. Maybe next time i'm jobless? Just able to cook a basket of red eggs as a present that's it :p



Chun bo? Sui bo? <3


with an elegant big cushion box *look like ambulance isn't it? PeePoo PeePoo*



The 1st time i wear it, i accidentally bang it on my table. OMG! Luckily SotSot didn't injured :p Shock me like heart attacked. Gotta take good care of it.

生存的意义

生存的意义到底是为了什么？

为什么人总要有喜怒哀乐，四个观点？
我不懂，不了解，不明白。

常常尝试的往好的一方面想，
最后还是回到了原点。

不懂老爸每天365天在家是为了什么？
不懂每天他是怎么娱乐自己，让自己过得无忧无虑的。
我真的好想知道。。生活是为了什么？

每天忙着学新东西来充实自己，
到底又是为了什么？让时间好过吗？
我开始模模糊糊地想起到底目的是为了什么？

每天不停的在工作，
日夜颠倒，做超越12小时，赚钱，赚钱，熬夜伤身又是为了什么？
钱在作怪？现在我都不在乎，可是怎么就没有机会？
生病又不好意思请假，
看着镜子里的自己好像人不像人，鬼不像鬼了。
还在执着着什么，我都不懂自己到底要什么？

意见不合导致耿耿于怀又是为了什么？
不爽他人的处事作风又是为了什么？
出声，身为朋友的，他都不听而且反被训话一小时；
沉默，感觉不应该让错的东西延续下去。
怎么心里常常有不爽的感觉，
都不通懂要怎样？
就是很多东西太过于执着，
不能把它让时光淡化吗？

生活怎么满脑都是烦恼？锻炼思考能力吗？
我才不要。。。

快乐的日子总是过得很快，烦恼却不能抛到九霄云外。
感觉真的好累，好累。。

几时才能又来个长假来松弛一下，我快要崩溃了。
长假好像才过不久，我惨了啦。。

人生就是这么的错综复杂。

要常常叮咛自己，做好自己； 问心无愧，你已经尽力了！
要常常的为自己加油！以正面来面对所有的难题！
要常常不求回报的关心身边的每一个人！

我能做到吧？*我就是那么喜欢犹豫而坏事* 改掉改掉，，

Happy Halloween 萬聖節快樂！

QB celebrating Halloween with custome competition. They dancing and having fun around! This is the very 1st time i've actually see how Halloween has been celebrated in my life. Don't believe me? I AM!

Went to Queensbay for family dinner. Drop an XL aeroplane to Min, San, Looi and Hui :p Sorry gals! HeHe.. family come 1st :D














Last but not least, Happy Halloween my dear blog reader!
-Few Few Few-

p/s: Don't you think it's a very short posting? HAHA! Ah Mah haven't in the mood blogging but soon gonna be, let it be tomorrow.

Tomorrow i will attend another my very 1st class about "dot dot dot", nervous-ing! :D Wait i've a lil result already, only i tell you then.. hehe! Tempting isn't it? lalalalala.... I seems like something wrong somewhere lately, like the end of my life. I just wanna finished up everything i've desired to do for all this while. People learned it when they're kids, but i've just started to approach at this time. Others considered under-age but ME over-age d. HAHA! Don't care la as long as i like it. Never too old to learn, just see you dare or not dare....Go Go Go! 活到老，學到老！Seriously I still got a lot of things to learn in my mind.. HeHe! But financially i think not allowed me to learn that lot lol...

That's it at this time. Toodles, good night~

1101 Baby 團長,祝你生日快樂，快高長大！Muahahahaha...

Lots of Worries

I've did a severe mistake on Monday. AGAIN! It's repeated after i did the same mistake 1 year ago. It's impacted a lot a lot!! I feel so down and frustrated..I felt sooo angry of myself, why am i always making the mistakes even the minor one... :'( I've tried to calm myself down with soft music but coudn't help at all, my mind keep refreshed what i've actually did. I thought i will be alright after a good sleep but i don't.

Tuesday: another working day, i'm fear to back to the office. I've thinked of taking MC to escape from facing the facts. But I don't, i went. I checked email immediately whether it has been solved. He showed me how management and client fed up about the matter, showed me how severe and impactness is it. Yea, I know that's about my carelessness! I really know it, i'm regretted!! This case really demotivated me.. I read the same email repeated again and again, i felt so sorry and hate about myself. My tears started to drop. I hate myself being so fragile, easily become cry baby. Am i really suit to this field? I told myself," Let's forget the past!!! Don't give up! Be careful and don't repeat it ever again, not to dissappoint those who trusted me all this while!" I'm so pleased that Boss was still trying to cheer me up in the meeting. "I'm happy that you admit your mistake and did apologize about it. Don't let this mistake demotivated you! Please be careful next time." His thoughts makes me feel a lil relieve. I'm happy to have an understanding boss.

Wednesday: i've been approached to him again. He reminded me again my mistake!!!! :'( How difficult am i tried adjusting my feeling 2 nights and I feel better now. It's solved. However, he non-stop refreshed me about my mistakes. I'm really pressured.... "Why should you keep repeating again, again and again. I tried very hard to forget it, can you don't talk it anymore?" But he said, "Everyone of you has different point of view. Some will appreaciate whereby they wanted to know the back-scene for those email which not looping anyone of you but some of you are not. So I choose to reveal to you" SORRY i really don't think so. I thinked it's over, I know what am i suppose to do next, it's just give me too much pressure and makes me uncomfortable about it.

I don't wish any cynical view from anyone out there! I'm gonna proved that i really can take this pressure. I thought i really can make it!! As at today, I just realised i gave too much of pressure to myself, frighten myself in different situation. Truth, i did it all correctly but don't know how's my guts feeling tell me some might be wrong :'( I checked again, again and again and finally realise i just frighten myself.

I thinked i might need a psychologist for counseling now!!!! Easily getting nervous and always guessing. I might getting crazy soon. Am i diagnosed with depression now???????? :( PLEASE HELP!!!!!

My 2 weeks holiday is starting very soon. I hope i can utilise this time, recovering from "illness" very soon and everything back to normal.

Anyway, THANK YOU SO MUCH for giving me support during my down time :)



深一深呼吸，把瓶頸的困擾忘掉；放開胸懷，迎接美好的一天。我希望我能做得到！麗玲，加油哦！！！！！